I just...

Mikayla · Apr 11, 2005, 03:29 AM

I know that most people don't care about other people's problems. Well Shut up then.

I just need to let it all out. I feel like crap. I feel that something is just wrong. Like something is missing. I've been fighting with alot of close friends and my family members. I figured I was just thinking to hard. Lost in my own thoughts. Like a fantasy (as cheesy as that may seem) I mean. I can just think of something bad and just say 'shut up' or 'Just leave me alone' out loud. I don't want to do jack. I just want to sit there and stare. I feel almost unsafe. I'm not that much of an idiot. I don't cut myself like dumb people do. I just want to sit there and scream shut up most of the time. I'm annoyed by just the smallest things, like one little sound, or a meaningless conversation that was just ment to be silly. I started to go to bed early. So sleep is not my problem. I just feel gloomy. I guess it is just me being my idiot self and thinking way to much. I guess I just feel lost and that just leads me into thinking, and I get deep into that, and it makes me over look thinks and almost makes me panic. It is so weird. Words can't describe it.

Anyway, I'm sorry, I just had to let that crap out. :/

Derextreme · Apr 11, 2005, 09:40 AM

Just Calm down Miko. Actually everyone have their ups and downs. Maybe its not your day, where all the bad things happened on you. People have to give and take, sometimes when your friend is not right and keep on scolding you, sometime i felt that you have to give in. For me i did not give in, at the end i lost that friend meaning we are like strangers now. As for family members, they would scold you for some reason, for family members if they scold you means that there is some importance in what they say maybe to help you or just a sort of warning from not doing something. I understand some parents are really over naggy, i also experienced that before and i quarrel back with my parents and i felt gloomly and something wrong about what i have done. Parents support us from small and if we really talk back, its not really right even they are in the wrong just give in and after the scolding just talk slowly to your parents or members of family, they will understand i doubt they are not a understandable person? Isn't it ? Just control your temper sometimes when small occurs, do not react so fast. Actually bad-tempered is not good for health. For you, My thoughts on is that you must relax , stay cool when things happens , try to give in to some people [ I understand its diffcult but try to its helps you. ]. Stay cool man.

. Hope you overcome your weakness. That all for my thoughts.

Nvm. Things that you have said are not craps, i also experienced before. They are just your feelings. Remember look things with bigger perpetive [Typo Error].

_J_ · Apr 12, 2005, 02:37 PM

I emapathise with you there. I live in a shit tip of a town, it's not like there's anything wrong wit the town itself it's just the people (and I use that term loosely) that inhabit it. LOTS of stuff get to me. I know what it's like when you're really pissed off and then people start messin' around and trying to be funny. People suck. I've decided to leave home at the soonest possible opportunity. I don't really know what to say, except for that you just gotta get on with things. And try not to think too much, it tends to make things more complicated.

krikie · Apr 12, 2005, 10:43 PM

Miko -

I'm really sorry.

Remember that long conversation we had about the thinking? You know that you're not the only one out there like that. You know that I have felt the exact same way - with fantasies, thinking too much, and heaven knows that everything annoys me. So you're not alone. I know how you feel when you just want to siit and stare at the wall. I've done it too, and it actually doesn't help too much. But really, we've talked about the thinking. Just IM me and we can talk it out ...

I hope it gets better for you

Sujin · Apr 13, 2005, 10:15 PM

ah im sorry bout that, miko. ive had those kind of problems too. the only thing i know that you can do is too keep on living. eventually, everything will be back to normal.

Mig · Apr 13, 2005, 10:33 PM

Argh, this stuff is hard to come out with.

This town here- exactly as _J_ describes his. Things get to people a lot, sometimes. I've been driven to boiling point before- and it's just one word that tilts the cup- spilling EVERYTHING. When things get like that, I find myself screaming at anything and everyone, even if they've nothing to do with it. Feeling down quite a bit is normal, but by all means not neccesary. I'm not quite sure (hey, I'm male) but you MAY be starting, and talking to my mum at the time of the month- she describes the world pretty much like you do. Maybe you need a partner in someone- like a special friend, a close relative you can talk to or a boyfriend- the feeling may be lonlyness.

Talk to krik about it, she'll understand, yeah?

Sofa King · Apr 16, 2005, 09:28 AM

Sounds like you're well on your way to a road of depression and disappointment. Hey guess what, that's life.

Seriously, life can be a bitch. It's up to you to see how you can lead your life. If you want to shut yourself off from the rest of the world, that's your decision.

Personally, I've already led the life that you are probably leading. But you know what? I've come to the realization that life can be actually fun. You can actually spend time with your friends and family and have a good time. Just know what you want out of life and do what makes you happy. Its more productive that way.

***Beatrix the Goddess*** · Apr 18, 2005, 02:45 PM

Miko, I think it what you need most right now is some time by yourself to wind down & do something you enjoy. Sometimes people & the world in general can be so intrusive and stressful that you really do just want to snap at everyone. I know you say you don't feel like doing anything, but I'd urge you to find something that you can enjoy by yourself. If you're feeling apathetic ten just kick back with a book or a game. You need to take things easy....life isn't only about deep thoughts, it's about enjoying yourself & doing things that make you happy; like Blank says. There are other things to balance too, but I think you need to concentrate on enjoying yourself at the moment. Have some alone time & spoil yourself. You'll probably feel refreshed & more like being with your friends & family. But if you don't, just take as long as you need.