Being Different. Share Your Experiences...

[cloudff7pc]

Being a college student, you're kind of expected to go out, to parties, to have a lot of friends buy the latest clothes. But I prefer to sit at home, browsing the internet and talking to people online. Writing programs and studying for college to ensure I get good grades.

Is there anyone else out there like this?

[Dedrus]

Being different... hm.
I mostly listen to hard rock and heavy metal and people decide to pick up on that at school... my friends also listen to metal, such as Trivium, though they try to show it a lot more than I do - i.e. playing it out loud on their phones - I assume just to make other people angry, or for attention... I'unno.
I have noise-reducing earphones, so I can play my music loud without much noise to other people... however, when I'm really pissed off and turn it up full whack, people poke me and say stuff like 'What shit are you listening to?' and 'I can hear that rubbish all the way over there.'

I just put my earphones back in.
But sometimes it can get quite annoying when you see idiots teasing you constantly by throwing the 'devil horns' \,,/ in your face and shouting stuff like 'Oh my god death rock, yeah! HARD METAL. LOL.'
It gets annoying, considering they know nothing about it, nor do they know why I listen to it - true, I am genuinely in love with the music regardless of my mood, however when I am angry/annoyed/upset I tend to scale more towards 'Death Metal' and 'Black Metal', whereas normally I'm fine with whatever.

It just... get's so annoying D:

[Sgt.Kupo]

Hm. I seem to have a lot of quaint hobbies that I don't find people my age having =O I'm 19 years old but I really love pen-paling (it's an addiction XD). I play tennis, make my own clothes (starting to at least.. >.>), play videogames, study a bunch of languages at one time. I seem to also have a really terrible anger problem *ONLY* when someone disrespects me (It's the Italian in me ). Other than that, I'm a very nice, genuine person who gives way too many chances ;-;

I don't know many girls who still play video games, and if they do they act so unbelievably dumb with their Wii D; I'm into RPGs from '96-02'ish era. I have a clothing addiction but you'd never guess I'm a nerd. I don't hide it from my close friends but I feel like a lot of people that I encounter (especially in college) would think I'm so weird. There's still a stigma with that, regardless of how accepted gaming is nowadays.

I've been through weird stages in my life. At first I was a cute kid, then I got fat, then I got skinny, then my face got chubby and finally, within the last 5 years I thinned out and got normal (took long enough, eh?). Mostly in 6th-7th grade, I wore hot-topic stuff and thought I was cool. I often wore sweatpants from Walmart and stuff I'd cringe if I did that today. I didn't have many friends, then. People though I was incredibly odd. I used to make noises in class and I had really bad ADHD. I also played videogames non-stop and I think I was absent 43 times during one school year. I hated school I went to private school for 8 years so it was really rough. 8th grade, I tried for...a month to be "preppy" or whatever and it was lame. I bought huge hoop earrings and I looked like such an idiot haha. 9th grade, I started going to a public school and could where whatever I wanted instead of a uniform. I went to looking "skater" (I did skateboard for 2 years, so I guess I wasn't "posing" ). 10th and 11th grade, I stopped caring what I was wearing because I was depressed about life. 11th grade I started dating this really scary guy who I dated for almost 2 years. 12th grade I started becoming a fashionista and broke up with crazy guy. (I got a job at a clothing store and it was really important to match and yadda). I guess it wasn't until 2008 that I really got on track with what I wanted to look like. Sometimes, I really don't care and I walk out from the shower and my hair poofs out and I leave without makeup but other times I care (usually when I'm living at my college, not at my parents' house). Most of the clothes I wanted to buy, though, were totally out of my range =/ (*cough*baby the stars shine bright *cough* betsey johnson*)

Now, I wear whatever I want and it depends on how I feel. Sometimes I suffer for fashion (wearing incredibly awesome high-heels while walking a mile or 2 down to the gas station ). I don't limit myself to certain stores (like high school forces you to do, basically). If I see something, I get it. I try not to go on sprees but its hard when I find a really cute store in New York City or something. Bah.

[noxious.sunshine]

Let's see... When I was 2 our next door neighbor's Boston Terrier bit a hole in my cheek (literally). I had to get 20 internal & external stitches in my face. I still have the scars, but they're not as noticeable as it was when I was little. I have 1 major one on my cheek and a smaller one (only 2 stitches I think) just above my upper lip where his eye tooth caught my skin.

A year later, when I was 3, I tripped and fell on my face and it killed the nerves in my 2 front teeth - they had to be pulled and didn't grow back in until I was in 4th grade. Oh. And I had 7 silver caps on my teeth. And I was the smallest kid in my grade (my elementary school went K-8th grade, small town, same kids all 9 years). Needless to say, I was teased non-stop ("Snaggletooth", "Scarface", the list goes on), even though I had better clothes than even the popular kids and looking back now.. I realize I -was- cuter than them. But whatever.

Then around 7th grade, I was the first girl to hit puberty. Or well. Hit puberty and actually grow boobs. Then I "stuffed". Haha. That was when my true Ugly Phase kinda started. I had quit the swim team and gymnastics both, kinda got chubby, though no one called me fat, and decided that I wanted short hair (no bueno).

Sure, I had a few friends. My best best friend, though, was gorgeous and outgoing and guys always liked her. (Actually, she's still gorgeous after 3 kids. Damn her.). I was more quiet and soft-spoken.

After 8th grade, I decided to move to Nashville and in with my older sister (12 yr age diff between us) to get away from the bullying. I thought choosing to go to a Christian school would be a good move. I was dead wrong. The kids there were awful. And the teachers did nothing to stop it. 2 guys even clothes-lined me going up the hill back to the church/high-school building for lunch. I nearly dislocated my shoulder and couldn't move it much for a week. Then Columbine happened. The kids said "Oh watch out! She'll come in with a sawed-off shotgun like those kids at Columbine!"

(BTW, if anyone remembers the big flood in Nashville in 2010, and the school that was on Extreme Makeover Home Edition for the Preschool re-build - that's the school I went to for 2 years).

I decided to switch to Public school the Summer after my Sophomore year of high school and was pleasantly surprised to find that none of the kids there made fun of me like all the other kids at my previous schools did. I'd also just completely given up on trying to keep my grades up too - by the time I transferred, I was behind like 4 credits 'cuz my 2 Bible credits didn't transfer and I had no PE credits. That's besides the point though. I was so depressed by the time I switched, my pot smoking increased greatly to every morning before class (slept in every class) and every afternoon after school.

(I'd been smoking pot already since I was 11 'cuz of my big brother. But that's another story).

SINCE I dropped out of school and started living life in the Real World (I have my diploma now. Again. Another story.), things are.. Better I guess? Sure I've still had issues (I was always too fat or too skinny for my ex in Phoenix), but.. I don't let it get to me anymore.

I'm still considered an outcast amongst most White People. My daughter is 1/2 Mexican and I've mostly dated Mexicans since '05. Her dad isn't in the picture, and there's no chance he will be.. Ever. The few white guys I've "talked" to are like "OMG.. Do you like -think- you're Mexican!? That's kinda gross dude." Simply because I speak Spanish, can cook some bomb a** Mexican food, and. Cuz my daughter is 1/2 Mex. I've heard it from white girls too (including my BFF. Where we're from, it's worse for a white girl to date a Mexican than it is for her to date a Black dude. When we were little, there -were- no hispanics in my hometown and only 1 Korean family), but not as much. LOL I remember walking through a Kroger holding my lil girl to get diapers (she was like 2 months old then and extremely tan, looked nothing like me) and I heard this punk kid mutter "Tell me how dat's yo kid" under his breath. He nearly got the heel of my 6 in stiletto in his eye socket.

So yeah. I've always been different. Made fun of, talked about, whatever. Now that I'm 27 (almost 2, I'm fine. Sure it was depressing and stuff for awhile, but.. I just decided to not let it get to me. My sister made me go to therapy and be on anti-depressants, but IMO, they were useless. Just like the therapists.

I'm just me. I do my own thing. Always have, always will. I'm funny and smart and I have an amazing kiddo that'll hopefully be the kind of kid I wish I'd grown up with in school (but I know she will be 'cuz she already is - she's in pre-K now haha).

The moral of the story is.. You'll get through it (if you're still going through stuff like that). And yes, I did hold a lot of it in. My sister knew nothing of the bullying @ the christian school until those guys jumped on me my Sophomore year. And now, sure I'll mention it every now and then, but it was so long ago, there's no point in talking about any of it now. That's the first time in a loooooong time I've gone into details about all that.

Anywho.

The End.

[noxious.sunshine]

Originally Posted by Sgt.Kupo

Now, I wear whatever I want and it depends on how I feel. Sometimes I suffer for fashion (wearing incredibly awesome high-heels while walking a mile or 2 down to the gas station ). I don't limit myself to certain stores (like high school forces you to do, basically). If I see something, I get it. I try not to go on sprees but its hard when I find a really cute store in New York City or something. Bah.

I couldn't live in NYC.. I'd be in a homeless shelter with a closet full of designer duds. XD

I have to buy my jeans from Buckle though - I'm only 5'0" and I'm -not- a size 2 by any means, so I gotta get my stuff altered. Besides.. Jeans from other places just don't fit me right.

We have a mall full of nothing -but- designer stores in Green Hills (a suburb of Nashville - they have 7, Betsey Johnson, Louis Vuitton, White House/Black Market, etc).. I've only gone in a couple of times to the Apple store though. I got funny looks each time. It's like they could smell through the Vera Wang Princess to the "Antioch" (the 'hood I live in normally lol.. It's ghetto).